The application process to become a surrogate has a number of different aspects. It is like a mixture of a resume, application for a new job, short answers like you are applying for college and portfolio with pictures of you and your family. Once that is submitted, you will have a phone interview with the Director of the agency and if all is a go...the next step is to be added to the "binder" of potential surrogates.
The Director receives similar information from Intended Parents and proceeds to provide the IP's with some choices in an effort to best match surrogates and Intended Parents. Both surrogates and IP's are looking for the best match for each other during this process, so both can agree or disagree to a match. If you are being considered as a match...next steps can include a Home Visit by an agency/social service professional who writes up a report about you, your home and your family and a Psychological Evaluation for you and your spouse.
Now...I thought seeing a counselor and having a Psych Evaluation was kind of fun:). Since I have a Masters in Professional Counseling (not licensed) it was neat to be on the other side of the "couch". The questions were logical and some interesting in themselves as they try to weed out those that wouldn't be a good fit. "How do you think you will feel after the birth of the baby? "What type of relationship do you see yourselves having with the Intended Parents?" "Do you hear voices that aren't there?" ...stuff like that:)
This is an important step in the process. Any parent would want to know that their surrogate and her husband is of sound mind and intentions. I am glad to say that Brian & I passed both times...whew!
To be a surrogate, some may think that you would have to be a little crazy. I would say we are a little more "out of the box" people.
I am 12 weeks pregnant today as a surrogate to a healthy set of twins. God is good.
2 Timothy 1:7 "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love and of a sound mind."
I am one of those idea people. I like to come up with new ideas, things to learn & do. I always set up my husband Brian to my newest idea by saying..."I was thinking and have an idea... What do you think about ..." and I fill in the blank to whatever it may be for this season. You would think by now after almost 15 years, those words would scare him, but he is an amazingly patient man!
To my joy, he was completely on board to me being a surrogate. Once I had the idea and his initial buy-in, I started to research the process and surrogate agencies. I believe that you have to make informed, knowledgeable decisions. We also started to pray and seek God's direction. As a couple, our marriage is built on unity and making sure that the bigger the decision, the more confirmations/things that line up in regards to that decision need to happen.
We knew that this was a major life decision and we wanted to make sure that we made it in full faith and complete peace that we were supposed to do this and were acting on it at the right time.
As silly as it sounds, the comedic movie Baby Mama with Tina Fey and Amy Poehler (2008) played a role in me becoming a surrogate. Baby Mama is about "a successful, single businesswoman who dreams of having a baby, discovers she is infertile and hires a working class woman to be her unlikely surrogate." This movie came out around time I was seriously researching surrogate agencies. God has used a donkey and burning bush before...why not a comedy?!?!
Other confirmations that I was to pursue becoming a surrogate included prayer, peace, open doors, unity with my husband, godly counsel and so on. If you haven't seen Baby Mama. Check it out. I think it is funny.
I am 10 1/2 weeks pregnant with a healthy boy & girl. The twins' mom and grandma were at yesterdays sonogram appointment. God is good.
Tiffany Jo Baker is a 3x surrogate, speaker, coach, confidante and cheerleader to help you birth your dreams.
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